Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Gaining insight

The underlying causes of my overeating - I just read my little profile blurb for the first time in a while. I have gained much insight since 2006, and I did lose weight. I also gained some of it back, but have kept most of it off. My lowest weight was maintained for a few months. Then I fluctuated in a range I could live with and now I am at the scare weight, in fact I do not consider this weight a part of a range I can live with. I want to get back to that lowest weight and stay in a lower range. I feel sluggish and slow. Maybe I am just too old to carry this much around with me. I want to feel more energetic. Lighter. It has to be easier to carry 15 less pounds. I want to finish what I started.

What are the underlying causes of not sticking to a plan?- right now I think I just give up easy because I don't feel motivated. It seems too hard for some reason. My momentum turned to the wrong direction and stayed there a little too long. Too many things happened in too short of a time and I got overwhelmed. But I can do something now.

So I am relying this week on small actions every day. I took another short lunch hour workout at the gym today. I appreciate it even though I tell myself it is way less than I used to do. But it is more than I have been doing. I used weights in the morning at home and a little bit this evening for upper body. I am turning myself around and pointing myself in the right direction. Maybe I am not moving fast, but I am moving, and moving toward the goal.

I feel like I am recuperating after being stricken with a serious illness. I feel weak, but I know I have it in me to do this.

So that is the focus for this week, turning around and facing the right direction.

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