I stayed in my food budget today and I walked tonight. It is almost eight and I feel satisfied. I did a few push-ups this morning. It was not easy and I did not get as low as I could two years ago. Last night I was looking at my exercise blog and felt sad when I read how many push-ups I was doing a day, among other things. I have been reading old posts and going back to when I reached my goal. Okay, I am only about 15 pounds heavier than back then and I can get back there. I did not stay at my normal body mass index very long, only for a few months but I stayed close to it, and then teetered up and down. Now I am solidly overboard with only teetering up and no teetering down and I want to overcome the feeling of being so far away. It's not that far. Not nearly as far away as I was in 2005. I want that excited - anything can happen - feeling back.
So I have been reading blogs. Blogs give me hope and keep me motivated. I don't feel alone anymore. There are so many great blogs with so many different strategies, ideas, recipes and so on. I could browse blogs all night long. It keeps me busy and it motivates me.
I also wrote a list of my "excuses" that I have been using to not get serious again. Then I wrote a counter to each one. It was a good exercise. I wrote the truth about each excuse. The truth is that I want to get back down to that normal BMI and back to that level of fitness. I want to get a little lower than that this time and then stay there. The truth is that I can do it. The truth is that it is not that hard. The truth is that I did it before.
So, no more excuses. I have a goal, I have a plan, I have my mother coming next week (yikes) and the holidays ahead but there is NOTHING that HAS to stand in my way. In fact, I can turn it all to the good. I can be that much happier on Thanksgiving if I don't go into that day (and it is only ONE DAY) feeling already bloated and defeated. I can wake up that day feeling lean on the inside from having some sane eating under my belt. I can wake up that morning with that excited - anything can happen - feeling. I can take a long morning hike with the dog and have healthy indulgences that don't leave me with remorse. And so on...
More will be revealed.
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