This weekend I decided to detox from the food and sluggishness of the past couple of weeks. I drank over three liters of water yesterday, special herbal tea, and went to the gym. I kept my calories and carbs and fats to a low. Today less water, but more gym and still low on the calories and carbs. Nothing dramatic but a big improvement. The gym helped my mood. I had been feeling the extra body fat I put on in the past month. It's weird, the pounds went up and down and then at the last minute they stayed up and I could really see them this time. So I don't know what I was gaining before but this time I gained some real live, very obvious body fat.
So off it goes and I also want off this cycle losing and gaining the same pounds. Yes, it is better than the Big Weight of years ago but it is not good enough anymore. I feel it more and I am tired of it. It is a quality of life issue. Plus, it really feels good to go to the gym. And I don't like seeing lumpy places in my clothes. I did not realize how good of shape I actually was in until I started to lose it.... and I want it back. It is in very close reach so there is nothing to hold me back. Except me of course.
A big part of weight loss and behavior change is being my own buddy. Working on my side and not against myself. Forgiving myself, making peace for any harms done, and moving on. I am my pal. I do nice things for me. I stick up for myself. I steer myself away from crummy choices and remind myself of how good it feels to benefit from the good choices. I am kind to myself when I make a mistake and I encourage myself. I need a good foundation with myself to make things work.
Anyway, that's the deal. I'd like a workout buddy to meet me at the gym but for now I will have to be the best buddy I can be.
More will be revealed.