Sunday, June 14, 2009

Going with the Flow

I learned a lesson in going with the flow last week when management wanted to increase the temps on my project from 2 to 11 overnight. I resisted because I was trying to organize the information files and documents they were preparing for scanning so that we'd have it group in a logical order, and so that I'd be able to make the analysis and determination of whether or not it needed to be kept prior to having it prepared for scanning. It made sense to me. I wanted to work at a reasonable pace making sure I could devote some time to my other responsibilities. But I got the additional 9 people and was told to go ahead and let them prep everything even if it was likely it was going to be destroyed. So they'd basically be prepping trash. It did not make sense to me but I had to accept it and work with it.

The 11 people are at the end of the project, I am the last stop. When I have no more work they will be out of jobs. They don't have severance pay. They just have to hope to be moved on to another assignment. So I have 11 people coming to me all day asking questions on documents because I have been training them to some extent on what they can throw away instead of prepping everything. Meanwhile I am going through files and boxes looking for things to purge before they get to it. It's pretty chaotic but there is some order to it. I am making the most of it. I had to accept it and see it another way because that's the only way I can work with a good attitude. I am trying to have fun with it, not worry about it, appreciate the overtime and experience and move on. I was having trouble sleeping and feeling very stressed. It is still stressful but it will pass, and it does not have to be as stressful as I make it when I fight it and think it has to be my way.

I did some work in the landscaped area in front of my condo yesterday. I planted some flowers in planters and set them out and I trimmed bushes. I had a nice chat with my next door neighbor in the process, and he gave me some potting soil. I also worked in the back which has been getting a little overwhelming. Everything is so wet from the high volume of rain we have had. There are leftover leaves on the patio that are turning to sludge and then there are these prickly balls that fall from my big tree. I have been working in small sections, cleaning up. I also planted most of my yearly border of impatients. It does not look as organized and manicured as years past but this is a different kind of year. I still enjoy it and I will eventually get the patio clean. I still enjoy it and I need to make it a point to go and sit out there more.

Being so preoccupied with work I have not been doing the mental (and physical) activities that keep me in a positive state of mind. And I need those things now more than ever. So I am making it a priority to do those things. I have not been to the gym now in months. I have been exercising but not the cardio workouts I get at the gym. I want to make it a priority to get there at least two times this week and take my daughter and grandson, too. Grandson gets plenty of exercise with the things he does for recreation. Daughter has taken a couple of walks with the dog, but other than that nothing much since school let out. We all need it for a better state of mind.

So here I am blogging early in the morning because it is important to me. I want to do the things I enjoy and the things that keep me grounded even though there is a major change going on in my life that is very distracting. I don't want to fall to other methods like eating stuff to relax or cope. I need my healthy attitude and peace of mind now more than ever.

1 comment:

Bea said...

Hi, I have been thinking about you as you endure this drawn out ending of your job. I hope you are taking care of yourself. When trouble hits is when we stop caring about ourselves. Weird isn't it? When we most meed the attention is the time when it is most difficult to give. Wish you could have had the California vacation. You would have been able to enjoy it more that I. Although the expensive facial that gave me athlete's foot would have been weird for anyone. "More will be revealed." Take care.